Why Phobos is cool

[Steven Schveighoffer]

On 6/30/20 5:40 PM, Walter Bright wrote:
> On 6/30/2020 1:33 AM, Chris wrote:
>> Personally I think that the sentence was not really rude or insulting 
>> but maybe polemical, so within the range of a passionate and heated 
>> debate, I'd say, even in a professional environment.
> 
> Calling someone "spoiled" is rude and unprofessional. Period.

I disagree with this. "spoiled" is a term to mean "harmed in character 
by being treated too leniently or indulgently". In that sense, the OP's 
point (right or wrong) was that you may have an incorrect expectation 
that someone will volunteer to step up because you have known nothing 
but people volunteering to do projects without you having to prod people 
into it.

In that sense, this isn't a derogatory or rude term, but conveys 
accurately what the person is trying to say. I personally would not take 
offense at someone saying I'm spoiled by D because it has too many 
awesome features. I have a hard time dealing with other languages 
because D is too good. It *HAS* spoiled me.

Begin even more off-topic rant:

I just want to also say, we are somehow in a time where people take so 
much offense at everything that is said. Basically construing what is 
said in the worst possible light, and I feel like this doesn't help 
discussion at all. It derails the discussion and cancels sometimes valid 
opinions without addressing them. I prefer to think people are mostly 
just trying to convey a point, and if they do it in a rude way, it's 
either because I may have misunderstood them (or they aren't familiar 
with the alternate meaning of what they said), or because they let their 
emotions get the best of them (it happens to everyone). It can be just 
as effective to point out the offense, and remind people that we should 
avoid these kinds of tones, rather than refuse to discuss further (which 
often has the opposite effect -- escalating).

So many online services are starting to cave to the slightest of 
offenses, and I hope this forum doesn't start doing the same.

As a funny anecdote, I worked at a company which bought bagels for 
everyone every morning. When the delivery would come, the receptionist 
would email the building saying the bagels are here.

One morning she misspelled bagels as beagles and added some phrase like 
"come and get em while their hot" or something like that.

There were many obviously tongue-in-cheek or friendly ribbing responses. 
One person, however, responded with one word "Cannibal!" It was someone 
I worked with, so I asked him if he knew what cannibal meant. He said 
"of course, it means someone who eats cute animals." Needless to say as 
we were in a more sane time, he was not fired for such an offense, 
apologized, and we all had a good laugh about it (at his expense of 
course). Deescalation and humor I find are often a better response than 
shaming and begrudging.

-Steve