Glibc hell

[dsimcha]

Apparently, DMD for Linux requires a non-ancient version of Glibc to work, and
worse yet, all the stuff compiled by it requires a similarly non-ancient
version.  The problem is that I'm trying to run some jobs on a cluster that
has an ancient version of Linux that my sysadmin doesn't want to upgrade.
Given that i don't have any root/admin privileges, and will never get them,
does anyone know of a workaround to make DMD, or at least stuff compiled by
it, work with ancient versions of glibc?

P.S.  Nothing illegal/unethical, such as cracking the root acct. please.